This is the second year in a row where May to June has been the most jarring, flip flop, 180 switch ever. Last year I was coming back from Australia, had no car, no job, no girlfriend. Then by June, all of those were opposite. This May, I graduated from LC, moved out of my old place, started a job, visited home, and felt generally very uprooted and frazzled. Now it's mid June, and I've started a second job, moved into my new apartment with Teeks and Laszlo, got a hair cut and my septum redone (and high nostril studs removed), and feel better, I think.
It's exciting to explore a new part of town, and settle into new routines. I got something off my chest that had been stressing me out for months, and deleted instagram again. I went for a run one day after work at the county building and wrote some unhinged single lines of discordant poetry in my notes app. It was so nice outside, and I sat and watched people play softball and kick ball in the park. I got really in my feelings, which was needed. I need to find new modes of catharsis, now that I'm an adult in the world (scream).
Here are some things I've seen recently:
👾 The largest protected freshwater wetland within an American city... it was the Smith and Bybee wetlands, which I stumbled upon when I took a wrong turn off the highway coming home from my piercing appointment in Vancouver. I got my board out and skated for a while, I want to come back with a canoe or something like that.
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| me and my trick board (i have 3 now >.< determined to get good this summer) |
👾 A little bunny lost on a biking overpass over the highway... I was riding a nike bike home from Roadside (where I had a furious public journaling sesh and a good sob while texting with ella and then a recovery drink with Qwynci) when I crossed over the I5 on a bridge for walking and biking when I looked down and saw what I thought was a rat running alongside next to me. I almost swerved and fell out of fright but then I realized it was a small brown cottontail, who was lost and looking over the edge trying to find it's way home to the burrow (probably? or the bunny clerb) and I screeched to a halt and watched worridly as it eventually found it's way back to solid land. Thank god. I don't think my psyche could've survived watching a young bun accidentally jump off an overpass omfg.
👾 A little girl with a bright pink cast on her leg... she looked like the same age as I was when I broke my left leg (first grade) and got a bright pink cast and a wheelchair. That's how I learned my lefts and rights, I just look down and remember which one of my legs had a cast on it. Real shit.
👾 A gorgeous classic car and a Tesla truck in the same day... I don't know what kind of old car it was but it was red and white and a convertible and sexyyyy. Cars used to look so nice and sturdy. I saw a tesla truck later that day and I think it was the first one I had ever seen in Portland. It was sooo ugly but also looked sturdy I guess. How do people see out of those??
👾 Water reflecting off of rocks as I waited for the shrooms to kick in... they never did. I kept staring at different things around me while we were at High Rocks to swim and waiting for them to look weird or different. I stared at a huge American flag in the distance, and it looked like it was blowing and rippling in slow motion. But I think that was normal flag behavior. I stared at water reflecting off the rocks for so long, and it was beautiful. But the shrooms never hit.
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| gorgeous reflections were going on in this region here |
I hope the rest of June is good and fun and I keep feeling more settled and real. I have a bunch of events happening around town saved in my calendar, and I am excited to go and meet new people hopefully.
"Used to burn Cds full of songs I didn't know, used to sit in my bedroom puttin' polish on my toes" - Rewind
